The Biblical Wisdom of Setting Aside your Ego and Embracing Criticism

We live in an age in which more than ever self-image is prized and protected. This area of pride tells us we are right and if anyone challenges our opinions or beliefs, we should defend ourselves. For some, it can be so bad that a person might believe they know better than anyone. We know of athletes that were harmful to teams because they weren't very coachable. You may know someone who refuses to listen to their doctor because they are sure they know better. We certainly know people who believe they are elite Christians and their self-righteousness is a blockade to any admonishment or rebukes. The truth is that ego can be a ball and chain that keeps us from improvement.

If we feel we are accomplishing our goals and on the right track, we may not feel as if we need anyone’s critiques. This can also be true if we compare ourselves to other people and decide we are better than them.

What is worse is that it can be a competitive situation as we see all over the world and on the internet. There is a feeling that if someone criticizes me or something I believe and they are right and I am proven incorrect, then I have lost. That competition drives debates that can go on endlessly.

In addition to disliking criticism because it might threaten our ego or embarrass us, it is often delivered wrong. It should come from a place of peace and love. It often comes from someone angry, impatient, or hateful. Even when it is delivered wrong, we should not immediately dismiss it.

One of the key elements of humility is accepting criticisms and correction. Much of this will come from God, but He also works through other people, which is the focus of this post.

The Wisdom of Embracing Criticism:

 Proverbs 9:8-9: "Do not reprove (reprimand) a scoffer, or he will hate you; reprove a wise man, and he will love you. Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning."  

As usual, you will see a list of verses at the end of the post, but the above two sums it up nicely. We want correction and instruction to be wiser and to increase in learning. No matter how wise you are, you can be wiser. No matter how educated you are, you can learn more. Our goal is to become like Christ, and if that is truly the goal, we should never be content with where we are. The next step is always refinement.

Notice too that if you reprimand a wise man, he will love you. This gives no room for being defensive.

I was reading a book a couple of months ago, which made me uncomfortable. I was uncomfortable because it was almost as if I wrote it. The author agreed with my views on almost everything. I suppose it doesn't hurt from time to time to get confirmation, but I would rather be challenged.

Growth comes from converting areas where we are incorrect into areas where we are right (or more right). None of us are as self-aware as we need to be. This is why outside perspective can be so beneficial.

What about people who are trying to criticize you, but you are not sure if they are correct?

If someone corrects you using the Bible, you need to get a list of the Scripture they are using. Keep in mind, it may take them some time to assemble it.

The first place to go when considering criticism is prayer. Humbly ask God to help you discover the truth. If you have a Scripture list, you need to read each passage slowly. If you do not have a list, then you need to work on creating one. If you need help hopefully you have some mature Christian friends who can help you. Topical Bibles or topical searches can help you,

You may get answers right away or it may take time, so be prepared to be patient. Just keep spending time with God while maintaining a posture of humility. Make sure you are not just trying to prove the criticism wrong. You want to avoid confirmation bias, so you may need to start by trying to prove yourself wrong first.

Some criticism comes from unbiblical ideas or unbelievers. Even when I doubt there will be anything to apply to my life, I still try to listen to see if there is something I can learn. Sometimes it helps me understand how they are thinking. It also helps me determine how entrenched they are in their positions. I recently heard someone say that they believed what they were doing was right and they were going to keep doing it even though it lacked biblical support. That made me sad, but it also told me there was no reason to keep pushing a biblical perspective.

Hopefully, you have people in your life that know you, love you, and are willing to criticize you. You need it. I need it. May we always be humble, thankful, receptive, and never defensive. 

---

 All Scripture quoted in this post is in ESV unless otherwise specified. Scripture used or considered in the writing of "The Biblical Wisdom of Setting Aside your Ego and Embracing Criticism" by RD Montgomery:

Proverbs 18:2

Romans 12:3

Philippians 2:3

Proverbs 1:23

Proverbs 3:5-7

Proverbs 3:11-12

Proverbs 9:8-9

Proverbs 10:17

Proverbs 12:1

Proverbs 13:1

Proverbs 15:5

Proverbs 17:10

Proverbs 25:12

Proverbs 27:5-6

Proverbs 27:17

Proverbs 28:23

Proverbs 29:15

Ecclesiastes 7:5

Malachi 3:2-3

Luke 17:3

Philippians 2:14-16

Philippians 3:12-16

2 Timothy 3:16-17

#criticismislove #growyourmind #personalgrowth #spiritualmaturity #humility #wisdom #learnandgrow #faith #christianity #selfimprovement #mindset #leadership #relationships #communication #opentolearning #biblewisdom #godsword #christianliving #walkinthetruth #becomingmorelikechrist